Yellow Brick Road

Chalk it up to first-time traveler's ignorance. First my purchase of the NZ bus pass that only got used once, now this? I originally planned on spending 2.5 months in Oz, but after that much time in NZ, I realized that I really wanted to move on, especially if the Australia was going to exhibit an even higher rate of westernization than Kiwi nation. So I took the scissors to my flights, sheering off heaps, and ended up looking at an almost naked trip of a week and a half, a mere stepping stone that would only include Melbourne and Sydney. I feel as though I was walking on pebbles when you consider the scope of the outback, and after I was done with what I now consider a pit-stop before Asia, I couldn't help but wonder how much I had missed. I didn't even get to frolic with any Kangaroos. And by the way, everyone over here thinks Steve Erwin and Crocodile Dundee were complete wankers. They don't even say shrimp, it's prawns, so the whole '!!lets throw another shrimp on the barbie!!' thing can go take a hike.

Melbourne really had its own vibe (unlike Auckland), and this feel of identity enticed, as the culturally diverse (at times I wondered if I was already in Asia) hub rotated constantly in a creamy swirl of traditional and indie, legato and stocato; the complexities of a fine wine mixed with the blunt jolt of an energy drink. All of this on fastforward, pressed down by a giant finger controlled by an omnipresent dollar sign from above. From the strange kooki-ness of the side shops, to the stunning graffitti epics tattooed on the walls of back alleys, to the crooked architecture, there was an underground affair going on here that wasn't being covered by all the tabloids. These uniquities (yep, just made up a word, deal with it) aside, I found that much of the city reminded me of America, so I spent much of my time trying to understand the things that did set it apart, mainly cricket and aussie rules football (aka aussie rules rugby), and a few guitar hero lessonse (...NOW, I feel cultured). Melbourne? Cool.

Sydney? Real Cool. From the perspective of a rising bubble, as I bobbed quickly from the floor where I slept in Melbourne, and burst to the surface on a king size bed. Forget the size. Bed. Period.
Thanks to a cruisy biological travel agent (Uncle Mark - big ups for the connection), I was in a Champagne bubble, staying with a wealthy family of five overlooking the Sydney harbour. I was tip-toeing along the upper crust of society, peeking back down into the pan and laughing at what I had come from. This was a different type of cultural immersion, as I spent my time trying to master the nuances of the ritualistic approach to Gatsby-like social interactions and the intracasies of the acceptable, so dominated by small talk, formalities, and the finer things in life that one can only find in aristocratic situations such as these. It was all grand. At times I felt a bit awkward, and not just because I was operating on different hygienic standards than these people, but mainly because the only thing I really forgot on this trip was my suit and tie. Now though, I definetaly see there's space for an ironing board on the back of my pack. On the real though, I had to exit the sea of facades at times, just to go have a gander with the kids (who are completely ignored at functions, much like the dog under the table trying to score a fallen block of bleu cheese) on the beaches of immaturity, and restore some sort of sanity to my life. The seed of homesickness planted in Melbourne sprouted, and bloomed in full on Thanksgiving, as the western lifestyle did little to deter my mind from my favorite holiday. Home has been on my mind, but this was the first true bout I've had with thoughts of return, and it was no thrilla in manilla. I'd go with Tyson vs. an infant. I can't complain though, between drink, food, and a bed, my yellow brick road to oz (may I emphasize the fact that it was a single brick) ended on a note of comfort that I don't think I'll experience until I return home.

Asia beckons. I'm coming as fast as I can.